apocalypse

Your summer, and my autumn.

2011-10-07T14:37:00.001-07:00

if your sun fades away,
let my dark clouds float and sway.

if your flowers start to wither,
let my leaves fall and shiver.

well if your summer found its end,
then just let my autumn start it all again

redemption

2011-08-18T07:56:00.000-07:00

what are we?

beyond redemption?

Forgotten

2011-05-31T02:48:00.001-07:00

In the middle of my 2nd year examination period,

I have found that,

more often than not,

I forgot,

the irony of this life.

Kalau gagal exam, boleh je nak repeat kan.

But,

If we fail this test of life,

There will be no second chance.

No second chance at all.

Forgotten will I be,

the same way as I have forgotten.

If only thou couldst see when the guilty ones will bend low their heads before their Lord, (saying:) "Our Lord! We have seen and we have heard: Now then send us back (to the world): we will work righteousness: for we do indeed (now) believe."

If We had so willed, We could certainly have brought every soul its true guidance: but the Word from Me will come true, "I will fill Hell with Jinns and men all together."

"Taste ye then - for ye forgot the Meeting of this Day of yours, and We too will forget you - taste ye the Penalty of Eternity for your (evil) deeds!"

Only those believe in Our Signs, who, when they are recited to them, fall down in adoration, and celebrate the praises of their Lord, nor are they (ever) puffed up with pride

Their limbs do forsake their beds of sleep, the while they call on their Lord, in Fear and Hope: and they spend (in charity) out of the sustenance which We have bestowed on them.

Now no person knows what delights of the eye are kept hidden (in reserve) for them - as a reward for their (good) deeds.

Is then the man who believes no better than the man who is rebellious and wicked? Not equal are they.

[As-sajdah ,32 : 12-18

Today, Tomorrow, and Forever

2011-05-23T18:51:00.000-07:00

Thank you for today.

Thank you for tomorrow.

and Thank you, forever.

How could I smell the fragrance of rose,

If I haven't had the the strength to bear its thorns.

“Dan aku tidak (menyatakan) diriku bebas (dari kesalahan), karena sesungguhnya nafsu itu selalu mendorong kepada kejahatan, kecuali (nafsu) yang diberi rahmat oleh Tuhanku. Sesungguhnya Tuhanku Maha Pengampun lagi Maha Penyayang.”

( Yusuf 53 )

"And those who pray, "Our Lord! Grant unto us wives and offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes, and give us (the grace) to lead the righteous."

(Furqan 74)

Thanks for everything.

Today, Tomorrow, and Forever

InsyaAllah.

The next stop

2011-05-18T10:58:00.000-07:00

What if you get off at the next stop.

Would you just wave as I’m drifting off.

وَالَّذِينَ يَقُولُونَ رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا

Al Quran, Al-Furqan 25:74

And those who pray, "Our Lord! Grant unto us spouses and offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes, and give us (the grace) to lead the righteous."

square one

2011-03-23T18:52:00.001-07:00

Time moves fast.

and its often too late

when we start to realise that

we cant never turn the tide.

time moves fast,

mistakes were made,

apologies were cried,

love came,

heart blossomed,

heart broken,

heart blossomed again,

there were lots of emotions,

and why does time

why does time always start a new rhyme?

time moves fast.

and its more often than not,

we seemed to forget,

that time will always leave us behind.

time moves fast

and how i wish

how i do wish to be back at square one.

"Wahai Tuhan yang membolak balikkan hati,

tetapkanlah hati kami di atas jalan kehidupan ini."

for a time in neverland

2010-12-29T12:24:00.000-08:00

from dust we are taken, unto dust we shall be.

as time goes on,
everything that is physical will become weaker. everything.

a real pity, if a man's soul will just be full of himself, and at the end of time,
becomes nothing but dead along with the physical body.

for a time in neverland,

a breath in my short life when im at you,
is real,
how can i not to be mesmerized?
how can i not to be captivated by your scent?
your soil is rich, flowers are blossoming.
and you will not be forgotten.
never.

some people say that the land, i shall not enter,
its too sacred.
but how shall i obey?
tell me how shall i obey?
when they cant smell,
the fragrance of rose.
afraid are they? by the pain of the thorns.

for a time in neverland,
if we shall depart.
then depart shall we.

this moment, if it wont last
may i humbly ask,
for ur fragrance
to just stay and linger inside the eden of me
just the eden of me.

umra : Medina

2010-08-16T06:39:00.000-07:00

And so our journey to Medina begun.
But it was not a smooth ride. One of the bus tyres was exploded due to excessive pressure( i think).
And hence we were stranded for more than one hour, amidst lifeless bare desert...

Medina was indeed very different than Mecca. Its people seemed to be more polite, and more civilised. The town was neat and clean. The atmosphere was serene.

In Medina, we felt more relax and somehow it feels like we were on vacation.

In Mecca,we visited the quba' mosque, dates orchard, and after that, Mount Uhud.

Anas b. Malik (Allah be pleased with him) reported Allah’s Messenger (way peace be upon him) as saying:

" Uhud is a mountain which loves us and which we love. "

The most remembered place for me at Uhud was the Uhud Cemetery of which some of the most prominent sahabats were buried, such as Saidina Hamzah r.a.

They sacrificed their life for the survival of the deen, for without them, we wont be a muslim as we are now. And what does not being a muslim mean? It means kufr, and hence, by Allah's Will, eternal hellfire. Nauzubillah hi min zalik.

and I wonder, how much do we really feel indebted towards the sahabats?

Save the best for the last. Masjid Nabawi was the main reason people visited Medina.
Here, lies The Prophet's grave, and nearby was the Baqi' cemetery. Most people wont miss the chance to be in Raudah.

Seeing the Prophet's Grave gave me extraordinary feeling. Though not being able to meet him, i knew that his body was there, I knew he was real. I was only few steps away from where he was.
I felt sad that i could not meet him, but yet grateful that i can pay him a visit, overjoyed that i can be so close to where his body was.

"O Prophet, Peace be upon You, upon your family, an may I be resurrected among your Ummah. "

And so it was.
Medina.
The Second Sacred and Blessed Land.
The city of Prophet.
The Land of which underneath, many of the first muslims, the Prophet's beloved friends, mujahiddun, were buried.
the Land, of where the Prophet chose to stay on even after Mecca had been freed.
The Land of where Muhammad S.A.W, the most noble creature in the whole universe, gave his last breath, while thinking about you, about me, about us, his ummah, although we will only know about him a thousand years later.

"May Allah grant us love towards His Prophet, of which his love to us, had let him drop his blood and tears.Amen."

umrah : Mecca

2010-08-15T16:23:00.001-07:00

9 -17 rejab 1431 Hijrah.

Umrah.It was a lifetime experience.Yes it is.

I am deeply grateful for one thing to be able to study in england, for it had enabled me to perform my lesser pilgrimage , at an early age of 20 ,which i never had imagined before.

Ustaz said that, the hajjis and the hajjahs are able to come here for two things, one, they really want to come, and second, Allah's call reach them, Allah choose them to come. We were Allah's chosen guests.

"Labbaikallah humma labbaik, labbaikala syari kalakala baik"
O Allah, verily here I come, here I come O Allah, to accept Your call when You say :

فِيهِ آيَاتٌ بَيِّنَاتٌ مَقَامُ إِبْرَاهِيمَ وَمَنْ دَخَلَهُ كَانَ آمِنًا وَلِلَّهِ عَلَى النَّاسِ حِجُّ الْبَيْتِ مَنِ اسْتَطَاعَ إِلَيْهِ سَبِيلا وَمَنْ كَفَرَ فَإِنَّ اللَّهَ غَنِيٌّ عَنِ الْعَالَمِينَ
In it are Signs Manifest; (for example), the Station of Abraham; whoever enters it attains security; Pilgrimage thereto is a duty men owe to Allah,- those who can afford the journey; but if any deny faith, Allah stands not in need of any of His creatures.
Al-Qur'an, 003.097 (Aal-E-Imran [The Family of Imran])

We spent almost 6 days at Mecca and the remaining in Medina, with akmal, hosni, and din scorpie as my roommates.

I lost 3 slippers at Masjidul Haram.
Got a heated discussion with Din about niqab and ended up by me and the others felt extremely guilty.
Akmal stranded outside hotel room in Medina due to "someone" forgot that he had the key with him during our visit to Baqi' cemetery, and strolling around shops.
I manage to have a try on "bekam" though it was real scary at first.
We manage to climb Mount Hira', all the four of us..!!and be annoyed with someone who proclaim loudly that he would go but yet when morning came he decided instead to sleep.

We visited Jabal Nur where it was sad to see lots of lots of beggars of whom we think were under syndicate begging us for money, and lots of people struggling to write down their names, maybe for fun or maybe for silly thoughts that it will help them get married or whatever.

That was just some sweet funny things that happened during our stay.

It was summer. Half of boiling point. temperature.It was teribbly hot.

It was the first time I saw Kaabah with my own eyes directly in front of me,
and i was awe-struck,
i was lost for words.
Others were the same too.

The thing about history is, to really feel it,you have to be at the scene where it happened, to see the land where it had unfolded, and mere reading wont give you even half of that.

It was the House of God, built by Abraham, it was this House that transform Macca as it is now.

It was in this very city, on it very soil, that the Seal of the Prophet was born, and hence, shed lights upon lights of a new era that you and me devote yourself with, know from from where we came, why we were born, what our purposes are and where we are heading.

An era of freedom, free from slavery to others except God only.
An era of justice.
An era of truth.

In mecca, the 6 days were spent by doing umrahs (most manage to do 5 ) , iktiqaf, and tawaf sunat.

We devote ourselves in Ibadah.
I really felt that it was like my whole attention, my whole life, was focused on Ibadah.
I felt like i was hypnotized.
I really felt I was in different world.

And that was it in mecca.
The Sacred and The Blessed Land for all mankind.
The Land where one reward is multiplied by 100, 000 times.
The Land of birth of our most beloved Prophet, Muhammad S.A.W.

your past

2010-05-25T13:35:00.000-07:00

this might be lame.

but i just watched "a beautiful mind" few days ago,

apart from behind every man's success, there's a woman,

i found something that somehow give a "click" on me.

its how john nash said that,
his imaginary friends are still there,
perhaps they will always be..
he just have to learn to ignore them,
how hard it will be.

When you made mistakes,
big ones,
they, will haunt you, each one of them.

you just have to learn,
and accept what you have done,
and learn to live with them in your mind.

yang indah itu bahasa

2010-05-22T11:27:00.002-07:00

bukan hidup yang kucari, tapi makna.

bukan tuan mahu ku jadi, tapi hamba.

bukan cinta itu namanya, bila suci itu tiada.

bukan iman ada di hati, bila diri sedang alpa.

2010-05-22T11:27:00.001-07:00

resah

2010-05-17T13:58:00.000-07:00

aku resah,
bila peperiksaan penghujung tahun ku punah.

aku resah,
diriku gundah.

ah!
manusia apakah,
periksa kecil saja sudah gelisah,
mengapa hidup yang hadiah,
tidak mahu titelaah.
mana bibit-bibit resah?
hilangkah sudah?

ah!
insan lemah
sikit saja susah
sudah goyah?

ah!
aku mahu berubah
tapi bilakah?bagaimanakah?

tuhan..tolonglah....

dear docs to be, frm engineer(oops..to be)..

2010-05-10T04:46:00.001-07:00

dear docs,

http://blog.thestar.com.my/permalink.asp?cat=1&id=30376

it is unfortunate that once you have graduated, you will serve in your country(malaysia), where you wont be respected, wont be treated well, and other few unimaginable things that you do not deserve to get.

and you might think that you should just work in other country. why should you work in a place where you will only be depressed along with low pay while there are many other much better options available to you.

you have worked and studied hard for 5-6 years, and yet the nurses and medical assistants feel more superior to you, treated much better than you. why stay?why go through all the fuss of the housemanship anyway?

you should leave. satisfy your need. there is nothing wrong with that.

unless you are government scholars..

why?

your education is being paid by the rakyat's money.
and you ought to pay it back.

not all of them, just to serve the government and enroll to the housemanship thing dutifully.
the problem is the housemanship thingy is such a mess that you definitely NOT going to enjoy it,
and if you can bear with that. well, you are such an angel!!

someone said, well,

"RM1.3mil (which mostly goes to the med school) as a barter trade for the life of a doctor."

agreed.
but the thing is, you choose to accept the trade. ultimately,no one force you to accept the scholarship.

what is the life of a doctor you wish to get for your education.?

if you borrow money from bank, can you imagine the interest, etc, which will make it very hard for you to pay it back.you gonna fork your life out to pay it back.(unless you are filthy rich).

why do you choose to accept the scholarship and trade your life for it anyway?
and yet now you make a fuss about it?

doctors to be(scholars)

i sympathize you.
i am totally angered by the way the system is being unfair to you.
you deserve better.

but dont you ever said that you dont want to come back and serve the government.
for that will make, your cause of being a doctor,

charity, help mankind,whatever it is,
how selfless it is,
becomes selfish in its own purest way,

for the most self-centred person,
is the one who do goods
so that he can feel good about himself.

ps/ im not a doctor, might be what i said is not true, to be honest, x faham2 pun housemanship or the system or other thingy that you guys are supposed to do...lol..=p..

learn to withdraw.

2010-05-03T16:12:00.000-07:00

ive learnt to agree to disagree.

i do hate it when people talk about religion but then they do not practice what they preach.
i do hate it when people do not care to heed what others have been advising and reflect on their mistakes.
i do hate myself when im becoming like this.

it is tonight,
that ive learnt,to withdraw myself from a useless argument,
and learn to humble myself..although i know im winning the argument,
and our argument only makes the other party looks foolishly pathetic.
as its not argument that he presents, only lame lamentations and accusations.

how i wish to humiliate my opponent,especially when the opportunity is there in social networks like facebook.

for as i am winning,
i am indeed losing,
as actually its the devil who is smiling.

i realise its not him, whom i hate,
its his actions.
its not him my enemy, its the devil.

and its not me who saves his face,
its God, who loves me and him more than I realize.

tribute tonight goes to hafiz.
for teaching me on how to berlapang dada..

twenty,andalucia and gibraltar.

2010-04-01T22:46:00.000-07:00

dear everything,

gibraltar, one of the hercules pillars, the jumping point of islamic civilisation in andalusia.
and andalucia, the ever captivating and mesmerizing wonderland.

and in these two countries,
i breath out air, of what have been my first day of my twentieth year, of life.

Yet still struggling i am,
to find out what life means to me.
and more important,
what means I to life.

labyrinth on Earth,
staiway to heaven.

one finger pointing out, the other three pointing back.

2010-03-07T10:37:00.000-08:00

this time,

i realy feel like im a hypocrite.

God, do save me.please.

itu haram.ini haram.

2010-02-22T15:48:00.000-08:00

itu haram.ini haram.
ingat bende tu haram.
mane bley buat,haram!
ko ni mendekati haram! .
haramlah!
woi,haram!
haram jadah!hare!

bro, ingt, haram mengharamkan yang halal tau..

"Warning against playing with the word “haram”

To conclude, we address the respectful scholars who tackle the word “haram” easily and set it free in their writings and fatwas that they should observe that Allah is watching over them in all that they say or do. They should also know that this word “haram” is very dangerous. It means that Allah’s Punishment is due on a certain act or saying, and should not be based upon guessing, whims, weak Hadiths, not even through an old book. It has to be supported by a clear, well-established text or valid consensus. If these last two are not found, then we revert the given act or saying to the original rule: "permissibility governing things". We do have a good example to follow from one of our earlier pious scholars. Imam Malik (may Allah be pleased with him) who said: “It was not the habit of those who preceded us, the early pious Muslims, who set good example for the following generations, to say, 'This is halal, and this is haram. But, they would say, ‘I hate such-and-such, and maintain such-and-such, but as for halal and haram, this is what may be called inventing lies concerning Allah. Did not you hear Allah’s Statement that reads, 'Say: Have you considered what provision Allah has sent down for you, how you have made of it lawful and unlawful? Say: Has Allah permitted you, or do you invent a lie concerning Allah?” (Yunus: 59) For, the halal is what Allah and His Messenger made lawful, and the haram is what Allah and His Messenger made unlawful."

taken from
http://www.islamonline.net/servlet/Satellite?pagename=IslamOnline-English-Ask_Scholar/FatwaE/FatwaE&cid=1119503544202

Couple haram.Couple mendekati zina.
Btol ke bro?Couple cane yg haram tu?
Sume couple sebelum kahwin haram ke?

Generalisation or perbezaan istilah fr me,
does not give us permission to say this and that haram easily.

I am not a scholar,
nor I am a pious.
I may be right.
I can be wrong too.
But I stick to the notion that playing with the word haram or using it sesuka hati
is indeed wrong.
Thank you, very much..

ps/this excerpt is taken on article regarding islam's stance on music, not couple.harap maklum.

best as i could?

2010-02-14T18:33:00.000-08:00

once i was asked,

are you muslim brother?
do you pray?
are you practising it?

"i practise it as "best" as i could"

that was a lie.
i know i can do better that what i am actually doing.

its not that we are matured, sometimes, it is just pure ignorance.

2009-11-19T16:44:00.001-08:00

i have a few friends.

some of them like to voice out their opinion publicly, being bold enough to put on negative labels on certain actions, certain issues, certain conditions.

i would like to see, where these people will go with their so called matured views
and would like to hear whether they will admit it that once, they have been ignorant, being blinded by the false impression of giving well-thought opinions.

its not wrong to try to develop your opinions on your blogs or other public portals,etc.

but being too bold and too eager to put on negative labels,
certainly makes people sick reading it.

matured opinions?

i guess no.

for me,its just pure ignorance.

matured am i? no.
am i ignorant? yes, partly, or even worse, mostly.

the wolves inside..

2009-10-26T10:42:00.000-07:00

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.

He said, "My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us all.

One is Evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.

The other is Good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith."

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: "Which wolf wins?"

The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."

a stranger that i first was, a stranger again i hope i wont be.

2009-10-13T14:09:00.000-07:00

It feels like she is slowly becoming further away from me..
it feels like i am slowly being moved further away that i can only see what's going on in her life from afar...

A stranger to her that i first was,
a stranger again that i hope i wont be.

You say you wander your own land
But when I think about it
I don't see how you can
You're aching, you're breaking
And I can see the pain in your eyes
Says everybody's changing
And I don't know why

So little time
Try to understand that I'm
Trying to make a move just to stay in the game
I try to stay awake and remember my name
But everybody's changing
And I don't feel the same

You're gone from here
And soon you will disappear
Fading into beautiful light
Cause everybody's changing
And I don't feel right

So little time
Try to understand that I'm
Trying to make a move just to stay in the game
I try to stay awake and remember my name
But everybody's changing
And I don't feel the same

So little time
Try to understand that I'm
Trying to make a move just to stay in the game
I try to stay awake and remember my name
But everybody's changing
And I don't feel the same

keane-everybody's changing

first ride

2009-10-10T16:56:00.001-07:00

it was my frst time going to a carboot sale..

n i bought myself a used bike fr 60 pound..

i had to cycle all way back to my home for about 45 minutes through places n roads that are totally strange to me of which ive never came acrosss before, hoping that i wont get lost along the way.

it was fun,
it was my first ride in bristol.

Its easy to forget Him,

2009-10-01T22:59:00.000-07:00

its allways great to meet people of different background..

i went to multifaith chaplaincy centre, and meet lots of muslim communities in bristol

and ive got to know sakeeb and shehzad, who are now in their second year of aeronautical engineering.

"you've got to have strong heart brother

and you always have to remember Allah, coz its easy to forget him.."

above of which sakeeb said to me,
keep hanging aroung in my head till this morning..
its easy to forget Him..and yes it is...for me..

last night at a shelter called home

2009-09-25T10:30:00.000-07:00

....
..

so, my last nite at home has at last, begun.

its another journey that i would sail upon, another phase that i myself doubt whether i can hold strong or not.

Its been a good day today, a very good one. Went out with my classmates, khatib, ainor, syazila. Got to go to many places. Somehow I realise that, some friends will just pass you by in your life, only few would stay, until the very last moment in your life, be with you from th day they know you, till the day you change and grow up bits by bits, and share memories with you pieces by pieces, until somehow that pieces turn into a beautiful puzzle of your own life, that you just cant help but to be mesmerized of it evrytime it appears in ur mind.
and i cant help but to smile on driving back home, pondering on how meaningful my friends are to me.

And Ive got my first compound, of not putting up a parking coupon. Oh my, its pontian for heaven's sake, since when does it need a parking coupon..?

I would surely miss my home, my family,
and I would surely miss her. I definitely would, much more than how i feel tonite.

Life keep changing, and so does everyone, and its the uncertainties of the future that creates the beauty of how to feel the feeling of hope ,dream, and even fear.

And that's it,
the pieces that Ive had today, of my life's own puzzle.

a tribute to someone important..

2009-09-07T09:07:00.000-07:00

The sky has lost it's color
The sun has turned to grey
At least that's how it feels to me
Whenever you're away
I crawl up in the corner
As I watch the minutes pass
Each one brings me closer to
The time you're comin' back

I can't take the distance
I can't take the miles
I can't take the time until I next see you smile
I can't take the distance
And I'm not ashamed
That with every breath I take I'm callin your name

But I can't take the distance

I still believe my feelings
But sometimes I feel too much
I make believe you're close to me
But it ain't close enough
Not nearly close enough

I can't take the distance
I can't take the miles
I can't take the time until I next see you smile
I can't take the distance
And I'm not ashamed
That with every breath I take I'm callin your name

I brave fire and I brave rain
To be by your side I'd do anything
I can't take the distance

I will go the distance
I will go the miles
That's how much you mean to me

'Cause I can't take the distance
I can't take these miles
I can't take the time until I next see you smile
I can't take the distance
And I'm not ashamed
That with every breath I take I'm calling your name
I can't take the distance

It's hard to remember
As long as you're away
When I find solace
There's only one way

evan and jaron - the distance

Thank you sensei..

2009-09-07T00:36:00.000-07:00

I only have few teachers in my life.

I ve been playing badminton in my nearby hall quite often nowadays.

And Ive got to know these two worthy friends which always encourage me on how to improve my game, and the way i play. Always tirelessly teaching me many aspects in the game that i am lack about. Always be patient to just have some strokes and dropshots with me, so that i get my steps and hit the shuttle right. And consider me their friend, despite the obvious age difference.

I just want to acknowledge my gratitude to them.

I just want to express how thankful I am.

And for sure Im gonna miss them once im off, out of my homeland.

Thank you, abg anwar.

Thank you, abg man.

miscellaneous.

2009-08-17T10:09:00.000-07:00

i did not go fr th graduation...

but still im glad that i can see many pictures posted by many kmbians..

so thats it..th ib diploma is now ours..

ive been working as a promoter fr about half-a-month, 8hours per day, fr rm 444.33.

mingling wif few people dat ive found out to be disgusting..it was a bad experience, yet a useful one.

"be proud of urself young man, in wutever u do.be proud."

"live ur life accordingly.dont go too fast.dont jump the steps"

..frm an anonimous one man as a piece of living in overseas advice..

ive been playing bdmnton with people much2 older than me, which i found out to be uncomfortable wif sometimes as i can hardly make any insultations or jokes while playing. however, playing wif them helps me to improve my game a lot. oh, and i still remembered th feeling of being "ayam"ised by this one man few days ago...it burns..

ive started to read "wonders of the heart" by al-ghazali recently.

in whatever i do, i realise that there r lots of things to be fixed and mended..

lots of things to be seen from different perceptions.

skeptic i am, self-centered i have more become.

ib-its th end.

2009-07-08T09:13:00.000-07:00

so its truly over..

ib.

all 6, except 7 fr eng.

B fr both ee n tok..

n im just grateful..

wait..am i..?

faith

2009-04-29T14:25:00.000-07:00

i believe that to achieve true faith,

we need two things..

a healthy mind, and a sincere heart..

there are people who knows lots of religious knowledge, but yet, dont feel at peace with their heart..

they can justyify an argument, they can speak in public, they can preach, they go to mosque, but within, its just empty..

healty mind, or intelligence, is needed in order to have conviction..

and a sincere heart, is of the same importance, for us to feel the blessings of having faith, and to act accordingly with our conviction..

having faith is not an easy thing to achieve..

heaven is surely a well reserved place for a true muslim..

and this place is reserved for those who really knows what does it mean in being a true believer..

I dont like coming to class!!

2009-03-10T11:43:00.000-07:00

...

....

i dont like to come to class!!

.....

......

hero

2009-03-07T02:04:00.000-08:00

There are lots of heroes in our life..

From the beloved prophet, Muhammad S.A.W,

to our parents, politicians, teachers,

and sometimes, friends..

Anyway, as i grow up, it is quite common that ive come upon one type of hero...

- always think that they have to stand up for justice,

but, by criticizing others at th back. Mayb these heroes just want to be unsung, i guess.

-When they criticize, they make accusation, , they use harsh words, when they dont know the real situation. Maybe all they want is to express their anger and their heroism act by some "brave" action like putting up notes at public places. Heroism act for them, funny..hehe..

-When others solve any issue, they dont see it with their eyes. All they see are mistake, failure, their dissappointment, etc.

-Unfortunately, some of these heroes, are my very own friends, and sometimes, myself.

a tribute for my classmates.

2009-02-14T10:21:00.000-08:00

My mum tell me,

that,

a girl that is keen on compassionate treatment from a guy(outside marriage) is letting herself on danger.

she's exposed to be used by men who's nice on words, but means harm to her..

im a man who's direct bout wut i think. There's no need for me to be soft and sensitive to girls who do not know how to learn to be women. Its a waste of my time.

Im not keen on having friends who are expecting nice and compassionate treatment from others when they themselves do not know to how behave themselves and appreciate others.

life is about survival..

keep on crying, and clinging to the past, and you will not go anywhere.

keep on manipulating the weaknesses of women as arguments, and u'll just be girls.

Boycott Arsenal

2009-02-02T21:57:00.000-08:00

I am a footballer fan myself, of Manchester United partcularly...But that doesnt mean i ask u to boycott arsenal because of my interest in Manutd..no,not at all..!!

It is due to faith and humanity that im pleading to you to stop supporting arsenal...

Well, one might ask, what Arsenal has to do with Israel..?

I suggest u open the following link.. and use your intellectuality to judge the action that you will take next..

One might ask, what if Manchester United supports Israel..?

I'll be a fan of another club, definitely, till Man Utd stops their support.

http://www.inminds.co.uk/boycott-arsenal.html

To my many friends especially in KMB who are fans of Israel,

i Hope u evaluate back your values in being one of the Gunners fans.

the most beautiful thing

2009-01-24T20:55:00.001-08:00

"The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt within the heart."

-hellen keller-

the most beautiful thing.....

something dear and precious

2009-01-17T18:32:00.000-08:00

*-*-*-*-*

“I say to you, this morning, that if you have never found something so dear and precious to you that you will die for, then you aren’t fit to live.

You may be 35 years old, as I happen to be, and one day, some great opportunity stands before you and calls upon you to stand for some great principle, some great issue, some great cause, But you refuse to do it because you are afraid.

You refuse to do it because you want to live longer. You’re afraid that you will lose your job, or you are afraid that you will be criticized or that you will lose your popularity, or you’re afraid that somebody will stab or shoot you or bomb your house. So you refuse to take a stand.

Well, you may go on and live until you are ninety, but you are just as dead at 35 as you would be at ninety.

And the cessation of breathing in your life is but the belated announcement of an earlier death of the spirit.
You died when you refused to stand up for right.
You died when you refused to stand up for truth.
You died when you refused to stand up for justice.”

-Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
From the sermon “But, If Not” delivered at Ebenezer Baptist Church on November 5, 1967.

mengapa kanak2..

2009-01-04T00:16:00.000-08:00

rumi : a children's game

Listen to the poet Sanai,

who lived secluded: "Don't wander out on the road
in your ecstasy. Sleep in the tavern."

When a drunk strays out to the street,
children make fun of him.
He falls down in the mud.
He takes any and every road.
The children follow,
not knowing the taste of wine, or how
his drunkenness feels. All people on the planet
are children, except for a very few.
No one is grown up exept those free of desire.

God said,
"The world is a play, a children's game,
and you are the children."
God speaks the truth.
If you haven't left the child's play,
how can you be an adult?
Without purity of spirit,
if you're still in the middle of lust and greed
and other wantings, your like children
playing at sexual intercourse.
They wrestle
and rub together, but it's not sex!

The same with the fightings of mankind.
It's a squabble with play-swords.
No purpose, totally futile.

Like kids on hobby horses, soldiers claim to be riding
Boraq, Muhammad's night-horse, or Duldul, his mule.

Your actions mean nothing, the sex and the war that you do.
You're holding part of your pants and prancing around,
Dun-da-dun, dun-da-dun

Don't wait till you die to see this.
Recognize that your imagination and your thinking
and your sense perception are reed canes
that children cut and pretend are horsies.

The knowing of mystic lovers is different.
The empirical, sensory, sciences
are like a donkey loaded with books,
or like the makeup woman's makeup
It washes off.
But if you lift the baggage rightly, it will give joy.
Don't carry your knowledge-load for some selfish reason.
Deny your desires and willfulness,
and a real mount may appear under you.

Don't be satisfied with the name of HU,
with just words about it.

Experience that breathing.
From books and words come fantasy,
and sometimes, from fantasy comes union

Jihad bagi seorang kanak2

2009-01-03T02:08:00.000-08:00

The most challenging things in a man's life :

1. woman

2. wealth

as wut my mum said...

the number 1 is already in my list..young adult male, what do u expect.?

number 2, i guess it will hit me once im in career part of my life.

biarlah no.1 itu menjadi jihad buat waktu ini..

Lust

2008-12-31T18:07:00.000-08:00

Lust is that snake; How say you it is dead?
It is only frozen by the pangs of winter.
Beware, keep that snake in the frost of humiliation,
Draw it not forth into the sunshine of Iraq!
So long as that snake is frozen, it is well;
When it finds release from frost you become its prey.
Conquer it and save yourself from being conquered,
Pity it not, it is not one who bears affection.
For that warmth of the sun kindles its lust,
And that bat of vileness flaps its wings.
Slay it in sacred war and combat,
Like a valiant man will God requite you with union.
When that man cherished that snake,
That stubborn brute was happy in the luxury of warmth;
And of necessity worked destruction, O friend;
Yea, many more mischiefs than I have told.
If you wish to keep that snake tied up
Without trouble, be faithful, be faithful!

By Rumi (1207-1273) trans. E.H. Whinfield

Dari Malaysia ke Palestin

2008-12-30T16:56:00.000-08:00

Study has shown that people up there always do not listen to the people below them.( sorry i cant remember the reference).

I put Israel as the people up there and we Muslim as the people below them in terms of political power, military, financial, and etc.

There are numerous demonstration to potray the world's protest against their so called "defensive, protecting nation" strike against Gaza.

But they are the people above. I bet the demonstrations held will affect their offensive action just a little. After all, action is louder than words. Nations with power, which usually arent Muslim countries, just condemning Israel's strike, without any action while Muslims countries, dont have the capability of defending their own brothers and sisters of faith.

So what power do we have..?

If we keep on following "them" in almost everything?

Financial system , Politics and judiciary, culture and entertainment ,education system , etc..?

How can a person without identity be successful in his or her life..yet a nation ?

The 2nd caliph of Islamic civilisation, Umar r.a , said

""kita dimuliakan kerana Islam. kalau kita mencari kemuliaan kerana selain dari Islam, nescaya Allah akan menghinakan kita"

Marilah kita bersedih atas kematian saudara-mara kita atas sebab kebodohan dan kejahilan generasi kita sendiri.

Dan semoga kita sudah bersedia dengan jawapan apabila mereka mempersoalkan di mana kita dan apa yang kita lakukan untuk mempertahankan ummah di mahkamah akhirat kelak.

Segalanya bermula dengan identiti diri, keluarga, masyarakat , dan dunia.

Dan semuanya adalah agama, kerana Islam itu, adalah segalanya.

Islam and secularization..?

2008-12-28T19:24:00.000-08:00

For Muslims, however, as Bernard Lewis put it, God was Caesar, the state was God’s state, the army God’s army, the enemy was God’s enemy, and above all, the Law was God’s Law. The problem of separating mosque and state did not arise as there was no mosque as an autonomous institution to be separated. Mosque and sate were one and the same. Muhammad was both a prophet and soldier, prophet and statesman. His career as a statesman was an essential part of his prophetic mission. Thus from its very inception, Islam was associated with the exercise of power. In Classical Arabic there are no pairs of words corresponding to "lay" and "ecclesiastical," "spiritual" and "temporal," "secular" and "religious." Islam knows no distinctions between these realms, it is all embracing and controls and has jurisdiction over an individual’s entire life.

taken from : http://www.islam-watch.org/IbnWarraq/Islam-and-Secularization.htm

al-fatihah buat atuk

2008-12-19T06:12:00.000-08:00

al fatihah buat atuk yg baru meninggal, pada hari Rabu,17 Disember 2008, jam 2.30 ptg di Hospital Besar Melaka.

semoga roh arwah dicucuri rahmat Allah dan pengampunan-Nya..

inilah kali pertama aku memasukkan jenazah ke dalam tempat persemadiannya..

ur past

2008-12-19T06:08:00.000-08:00

u cant really run away from ur past...

u thought its over,

u thought u'd buried it deep enuf,

u do r tryin to chnge,

to mend ur mistake,

but yet,

ur past will eventually claw its way up back to u..

melayu, malaysia , dan sekularisme

2008-12-14T07:50:00.000-08:00

i kept thinking and thinking bout ths issue of "ketuanan melayu".

i feel like theres smthng wrong about it..

people usually associate malay wif muslim..

but when it comes to this issue, im nt sure whether they see and undrstand it frm islamic guidelines..i myself doubt my undrtsanding..

From th last khutbah of th Prophet S.A.W

Wahai manusia, dengarlah bersungguh-sungguh kata-kataku ini, sembahlah Allah, dirikanlah solat lima waktu, berpuasalah di bulan Ramadhan, dan tunaikanlah zakat dari harta kekayaan kamu. Kerjakanlah ibadah haji sekiranya kamu mampu. (Semua manusia berasal dari Adam dan Hawa, tidak ada (bangsa) Arab yang lebih mulia dari (bangsa) bukan Arab atau (bangsa) bukan Arab lebih mulia dari (bangsa) Arab; juga tidak ada yang (berkulit) putih lebih mulia dari yang (berkulit) hitam atau yang (berkulit) hitam lebih mulia dari (berkulit) putih) Ketahuilah bahawa setiap Muslim adalah saudara kepada Muslim yang lain. Kamu semua adalah sama; tidak seorang pun yang lebih mulia dari yang lainnya kecuali dalam Taqwa dan beramal saleh.

So..are we more superior than other races..

that they cant get scholarships, tender , etc..?

rnt we muslim can get economical support frm zakat, whch is more than enuf if corporate sector do take heed of ths responsibility...?

so, i would like to know what these people or leaders who always associate muslim n malay wuld like to say bout this..

racism is part of secularisme..

aint anyone who is muslim, regardless of skin, races, status...

r one true ummah..?bonded by th conviction that there is no God but Allah n Muhammad was th prophet of Allah...?

this nation needs real muslim leaders..

not just some puppet who is being used unconciously by th hand of secularization..n th lack of undrstanding of wut modernization really is..

MPP

2008-11-13T06:16:00.000-08:00

Salam,

Due to the official end of term of the 07/09 MPP,

i would like to express my gratitude for those who always support directly, or indirectly, by giving encouragement, and even criticism.we apologize for any wrongdoings and any dissatisfaction to any parties in the college, due to any of our decisions throughout the term.

i would like to congratulate the new elected MPPs and pray that they will be successful in achieving the students' council objective of establishment.

thanks to isac, who is always supportive in helping us regarding presentation.

thanks Kam n Chong.

salam.

a tribute to my mum

2008-11-09T02:49:00.001-08:00

tday is my mum's birthday,

i wish her all the happiness in ths world,

and hereafter.

i love her.

a tribute to a loser that i've come upon..

2008-10-30T03:50:00.000-07:00

Have you ever come upon a loser..?

A loser,

Total loser...

having that ego so high,

but yet he is just some crappy loser,

who whether intentionally or unintentionally,

hide behind the veil of knowing how to talk and twist things in religion,

recite the qur'an beautifully and always take the front line of an imam,

enjoy and seek the state of being in a limelight,

and at worst,

did not practice wut he has said..

huh,

this time im a criticiser,

and i know,

that it aint come from my pure intention of advising in this post,

its more to letting go some part of my inside,

which hate this type of behaviour that exists,

in some of us.

worst thing,

i do realise and afraid,

that sometimes ,

this behaviour which im pointing out at him,

is pointing back at me.

Ya Allah, protect me from this feeling of hatred.

salam.

sahabatku, seorang pemuda kristian

2008-10-25T16:26:00.000-07:00

jumaat,

ak di kl sentral,
memikirkan hala tuju seterusnya...
perut pun dah berkeroncong..T.T

ak ke kfc..
meja dah penuh,
ak pun duduk di satu meja,
seorang cina, dari air muka, baru 20 lbey..

namanya chi hau,
dia seorang christian, non-denomination,
dtg ke kl sentral, jumpa member2 "usrah",
utk wat planning aktiviti church diorang..

ak pun terus brtnya, dan brtanya,
diorng mmg buat bnyk aktiviti,
fund raising, charity consert,
gathering every week utk strenghten each other faith(mcm usrah!!)..,
g kt mall n approach org awam utk share faith diorang, etc..
n diorang sume volunteer..

haih,
ak seorang muslim,
di negara islam,
yg sah di sisi undang2 utk berdakwah..
tapi ak tenggelam..

semoga pemuda2 kristian ini,
akn dapat mencari,
apa itu kebenaran yang sebenarnya,
ameen..

pengkritik muslim dan yang muslim yang dikritik

2008-10-21T08:01:00.000-07:00

pengkritik,

ada yang hanya lebih mahu menjatuhkan air muka,

dan menceritakan keburukan orang lain,

di hadapan khayalak ramai..

dari membawa kepada kebenaran,

dengan kata-kata yang berbaur fitnah,

dan tidak melambangkan,

keikhlasan dalam kritikan,

pengkritik menonjolkan keangkuhan diri,

kerana bisa mengkritik..

yang dikritik pula,

ada yang sukar mengambil apa yang baik dari kritikan,

walau busuk mana pun kritikan tersebut,

pasti ada kebaikan,

jika tiada kebaikan,

pasti ada peringatan,

jika tiada peringatan,

pasti ada panduan..

yang dikritik,

kadangkala menjadi seperti pengkritik,

angkuh menerima kritikan,

seperti mana pengkritik angkuh dalam memberi kritikan..

pengkritik dan yang dikritik,

hapuskanlah keangkuhan,

amar ma'ruf nahi munkar itu,

perlukan keikhlasan,

yang dihiasi dengan kerendahan hati

dalam memberi dan menerima kritikan,

hakikatnya utnuk membawa kepada keimanan,

mengajak kepada kemaslahatan,

bukan mencetus permusuhan..

pengkritik dan yang dikritik,

"sesungguhnya,

seorang muslim itu,

ialah apabila saudara muslimnya yang lain,

terpelihara dari lidah dan tangannya..."

sambutan raya d kmb

2008-10-10T02:16:00.001-07:00

salam,

On behalf of the students' council, i would like to apology for any drawbacks in the college sambutan raya..

such as,

murtabaks werent enough not enough due to some students took more than one....

and maybe some of the foods did not taste well..

after all,

we hope that it was a satisfactory event and as a pioneer project, we hope that the next mpp ,which has helped us a lot in this event, can do much better..=)

selamat hari raya

maaf zahir batin

from the students' representative council, 07/08.

ps/

thanks to kam, din n othrs fr th video,

naiman, muiz n othrs as well fr th dj part,

hosni as the mc,

n many more who has contributed n supported this event,,

alhamdulillah..

all praise is due only to God...

salam.

zakat, satu penyelesaian skala global

2008-10-06T09:37:00.000-07:00

andai umat Islam di Malaysia bayar zakat,

zakat fitrah, zakat harta, dan zakat2 lain..

hilanglah pengemis2 di jalan2,pasar2,

yang saudara seagama,

andai sume bayar zakat,

orang melayu, yang selalunya islam,

boleh dapat biasiswa dr zakat,

cina,india, dan lain2 bley dpt biasiswa dr kerajaan dgn adil,

diorng pun bayar cukai gak..

org melayu, bley dpt dr zakat..n dr kerajaan.

andai sume umat islam kat dunia bayar zakat,

darfur,palestin,bosnia, dan lain2..

bley maju..masalah kebuluran hilang..

tiada lagi negara dunia ke-3 oleh negara islam...

tiada lagi pembulian ekonomi oleh negara barat,

bila negara islam bersatu, dngan sistem ekonomi berlandaskan syariah..

kita x perlu risau akan masalah kejatuhan ekonomi..

andai sume umat islam sedar,

x perlulah ak tulis sume ni..

huhu..

slamat kembali ke kmb..T.T..

raya : past : mending wut is damaged

2008-10-04T20:36:00.000-07:00

salam..

dear reader,

ive read somewhere that u cant run away from ur past no matter hw hard u try..

ur past will eventually claw it way back to haunt u through wut's left from ur scar..

scary aint it...

ths week,

ive been trying to mend my past,

to repair wut is damaged..

n i found out that th best way fr me to mend wut is already broken,

is to be ready to expose myself to more vulnerability..

huhu..

n nw i cn take a sigh,

that i hv exposed myself..

wut has passed, has passed...

n my past,is mine,

not urs to noe..

aidilfitri

2008-10-04T01:18:00.000-07:00

salam..

dear reader,

thou i might dun noe u,

still,to u, i might hv done smthng wrong.

i wish u,

selamat hari raya..

maaf zahir batin.

raya is fr ones wh fight n strive to achieve taqwa,

n honestly,

ths raya,i feel like i aint not included in that category,

T.T

i guess that makes my raya is not as meaningful as it supposedly be..

T.T

oh..bytheway,

it came across my mind

when th takbir "berkumandang"

why in malaysia it sounds so sad..?(im nt sure whether its th same in othr countries)

hmm, wt r we lamenting act..?

is it due to the fact that we did not get anythng frm th just passed ramadhan..?

r we in a grieveng ceremony..?

i thought raya is a celebration..of a muslim triumph..not some sort of grieving ceremony of smeone who's dead or cant celebrate th raya with their family....

nway,its just a thought,

i, myslef, cant help to recite th takbir as it is..

its too melodious and nostalgic to resist..huhu..

only God knows..wallahualam..

ps/dear reader,hope that ur raya is not as unfortunate as mine..=(..

salam

Publish Post

ramadhan

2008-09-24T19:49:00.001-07:00

salam..

buat diriku..

yang telah tewas di akhir perjuangan ramadhan ini...

semoga kau masih berpeluang menebus kembali apa yang telah hilang,

jika ramadhan masih hadir dan masih ingin akan dirimu...

tabattul..

2008-09-22T03:31:00.000-07:00

Peace be upon You,

dear reader.

alhamdulillah,

last weekends, i spent th days at masjid sepang,

th big mosque which is near the highway to klia.

ive learnt many things, definitely...

and truly i was impressed by ustazah arpah...

she brought out the tabattul concept...

of being a true human...a true muslim...

based on example given by The Prophet Muhammad S.A.W and his companions..

willing to sacrifice all that u have, of becoming a true muslim, a true da'i...

it was my first time, meeting with a woman, that is willing to sacrifice all of what she posses to seek the pleasure from Allah....

a woman, not a man..

an old lady, not young...

i was,

truly moved,

truly inspired..

may Allah grant you, dear reader,

and me,

guidance and strong foothold in His Path..

amen..

distant..

2008-09-17T06:48:00.000-07:00

distant,

sombre,

tired....

a muslim as i am,

i know,

i am supposedly

should not feel like so..

My Lord,

I implore that you pour your Mercy on me...

amen..

Glory be to You,
we have not been able to know You as Your knowledge requires, O Known One!
Glory be to You,
we have not been able to worship You as Your worship requires,O Worshipped One!

what are we afraid of ..?

2008-09-16T12:02:00.000-07:00

Dear Reader,

Peace be upon you...

aint it true that..

smetimes we feel a bit afraid to read any articles, websites,

that r served to criticise our beliefs..

as a muslim, or even for any other non-muslims,

we indeed believe that our faith is the truth..

but aint it fairly reasonable to say that a part of our faith is still based on blind conviction..,

due to th fact that we r scared that we might find that our beliefs might be proven to be wrong in those articles...?

oh no..the fear of being proven to be wrong exist...!!..

a big problem fr one wh feel satisfied enough fr his/her undrstanding of religion...

as a muslim, with a conviction that islam is indeed the truth, it is compulsory fr us to seek knowledge...and to seek answers fr our doubts...

as iman, is not smthing that is based on blind conviction..

faith, fr me, is not merely as ignorant as that...

dear reader,

if we r nt afraid to read such articles and seek th answers,..

then,

it is fair to claim that

our faith is not blindly based...

and as fr me, islam..is a faith,

a way of life fr the intelligent ,

nvr it will be a faith

fr fool,

one wh doesnt wnt to think..

"O Allah ! I ask You for everlasting iman ,

and i ask You for a heart which should fear You,

and i ask You for a true confidence in You ,

and i ask You for a firm deen.."

amen..

salam,

i welcome you to..

"apocalypse"..

a new start

2008-09-16T08:55:00.000-07:00

dear reader,

peace be upon you.

today, there is a discussion with one of my my christian classmate regarding his faith.

Its a good start for promoting mutual understanding.

hi

2007-08-02T01:30:00.001-07:00

fisrt blog..